Mike Albo is fashion. The evidence: his day-off floppy hat of choice at left, his “Critical Shopper” column in The New York Times or the following from the “Ejaculations” section of mikealbo.com: “I don't change my clothes, I change yours.”Albo’s comic novel, The Underminer, introduced the concept of the “frenemy.” The New York Times called it “passive aggression as an art form.” Albo subtitled his book: “The Best Friend Who Casually Destroys Your Life.” Without further ado, The Underminer is back to destroy your holidays with his top three insult gifts:
The Entire Biore Product Line
“Hey, I know you have this whole ‘rage against the machine’ scruffy look going on but sometimes poor hygiene is just masking a deeper pain. I just want you to know that you deserve love just like anyone else. I just worry about you.”
Renee Fleming Perfume“We’ve all been saying how great and relieved we are that you have been wearing fragrance. But don’t get all crazy and soak yourself in cologne like you did with Drakkar in High School! Ha!”
Buttock Enhancers
“You look great! I didn't realize BCBG made velvet pants in a 14. Online orders, right? They look great on you! As a trend consultant for LVMH I have been so busy working on fashion concepts for 2011 that I almost forgot that you and other calendar-based consumers are only just now getting a look at the Fall 2008 season!”
photo credit: Blaise Allyson Kearsley
